


The Color of Fire

by angeldescendant



Category: Devilman (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Boxing & Fisticuffs, Drama, F/F, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-11
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-04-21 12:30:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14284956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angeldescendant/pseuds/angeldescendant
Summary: Post-DMCB. Another reality, another doomed existence. Stripped off his powers and his demon associates, Ryo just wants to get this cycle over with and become an insignificant pebble off the beaten path of fate. He should’ve known God is not merciful by now, especially after an unexpected meeting in a makeshift ring with a person from a past life. An underground boxing AU.





	1. I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m dumb and I have liked fighting manga ever since I was a kid. Allow me to indulge in this lmao. Plus I set it in the usual third-world backdrop because I miss home.

_But nothing moves. Somewhere_ _  
You are actual. Happen to me there._

_-As Far as Cho-Fu-Sa_

* * *

 

Ryo knew a long time ago there were no moons orbiting the earth.

 

The humans called them myths, stories, questionable truths. A multi-directorial, collaborative narrative that’s spun across generations and told across networks of people.

 

Humans try to bullshit their way to make sense of the absurdity of the world. That was understandable. They weren’t there when it happened.

 

For him, the moons were a reminder. A warning. An ostentatious memento of him playing God.

 

There was a loud shuffling of notebooks and shoes and desks moving. He waited for most of his classmates to leave. He continued staring at the moons.

 

Of his failures, and someone else.

 

* * *

 Akira was not in this timeline. He had not met him as a child. Neither had he met him anywhere in university, or on the commute home, or on the train, in the FX, in the jeep, under the downpours of typhoon season, on the dank alleyways leading up to his dormitory; maybe He decided not to make him exist in this timeline, just as how Ryo cannot manifest wings here.  
  
If God was a little bit merciful, he would have bestowed him with sideburns and a badass long coat instead of a pussy bowl cut and a puppy voice. Or cash. Know what, he’d just take some crisp one billion dollar bills and be done with it.

 

The classmates he would care less about rambled on whether to try this new diner or club activities or other bullshit capitalism or hedonism or other human-invented concepts that would steadily corrode them and leave them empty and broken enough to philosophize about death in their humanities classes anyway. Humans were dying the moment they were born. It was no fucking brainer. Humans like overcomplicating shit. _Just eleven more months of this_ , he thought. Eleven more months of listening to inanity and whispers then he can choose any path he wished.

 

The train hasn’t broken down this time around. Even in the dingy walls of the train back had him listening to the babbling of students and peering at exhausted employees. The traffic below was also slow and prone to puffs of smog that were more visible under the long shadows cast by the twenty-something floor buildings above. He could even smell someone’s rancid breath or the sweat from anonymous armpits.  

 

He breathed through his mouth and looked on ahead. He would want to say he disliked this grind, but he eventually got used to it after junior high. When he couldn’t see the view and only the throngs of people flanking all his sides he looks down and holds his bag close to him in case he lost another phone for the nth time. He focused upwards, at the innocuous ads littering the sides above him. He knew them by heart, even the past ones. _Colgate. Government propaganda._ _Proper condom use._ It increased his attention on the droning voice of the recorded announcer that often broke down and would be replaced by the train operator.

 

 

He wanted to say His son’s name in vain, but it wouldn’t piss Him off enough to turn him into a pillar of salt. It’s not like these ingrates get struck by lightning with every swear word. _If God is all loving and all powerful why is there evil in the world? I don’t know unrepentant reprobates why don’t you ask the hole where you all came from you ingrates don’t deserve shit you ingrates should have all gone extinct and he should have survived and joined me and_

 

During those moments Ryo would let himself walk and pass through the rush hour like a body of water, slipping to and fro people, past who were as exhausted and unlucky as he was to be commuting either on a humid or a rainy day as that one, forsaken by the goddamn institution they call the government, and just doing their best to go home and then fight another day.

 

He couldn’t help but smirk coyly at the irony whenever he turned the key to enter the dorm. He may detest the creator, but he detested himself more.

 

Self-loathing was enough to remind him he was human too.

* * *

 

He did try finding Akira in this plane of existence, but being a normal human born without privilege made it difficult as the years came and went to shed newer skin. Before long, he ceased to care. It was easier to desensitize oneself than to give a shit about harsh inequalities he possessed. Comparing oneself to other ingrates was another human thing to do.

 

“You’re early,” Wamu noted, snapback still attached to his head as he lounged on their barely upholstered sofa that was more greyed cloth than black patent. Their landlady kept promising to ignore replacing it for three years since Ryo moved there for university. “And I think Gabi finished the rest of your coke.”

 

“It was you, jackass-“ It was the usual routine again. Normally, Ryo would cave in and raze their chips and junk food supply under the mercy of bile and stomach acid but it was already six o’clock and taking either the jeep or bus with swarms of commuter wasted two hours of his time on an average day. Instead, he ignored them and prepared to go to their shared bedroom, opening the lock in case they attempted to borrow the clothes he scrummaged from the vintage thrift store just across the street for their auditions to a random second-rate talent show instead of pitching their EPs on the studio again. It was the third time this month when they managed to pick the lock so he bought a bicycle lock at their university batch group in response. His dorm mates were getting craftier, but they had a third of his brain.

 

“What, already?” Wamu raised an eyebrow when Ryo came back with his duffle bag and wearing his usual frayed jeans and hoodie getup. “Didn’t you go two weeks ago?”

 

“I’ll be back late,” he ignored him. “Pizza’s coming in a few.”

 

“Make sure you win. Ma’s sending my allowance two weeks after the rent’s due.”

 

“Can’t you tell her to send it earlier? Isn’t that what your mouth’s supposed to be for?”

 

“Fuck you, man. You don’t know my story.” _And he doesn’t give a shit._

 

“Will that ultra crazy stupid fine amazon chick be coming here today?”

 

“Didn’t tell her,” Ryo brushed aside and did not bother elaborating when he closed the door. He still had a busted knee from the last time he went and the last thing he needed was for his coach to ask if he had a death wish. Besides, he needed money. Those freeloaders already wasted it on booze and weed with that wannabee agent of theirs. He also had to cover expenses for an org project because of their fucked up financial laws. He got extra street barbecue on the way before hailing a jeep to his destination. He ignored the bastard lolling to sleep as he tried leaning on his shoulder, or that girl in a uniform from some university texting rapidly about the blond-haired foreigner sitting beside her and how hot he was.

 

He wanted to deny it because it would mean that the bastard in heaven did something right in this lifetime. He passed on his loose change to the driver and leaned on the handlebars, expecting a quick shut-eye.

 

* * *

Miko still texted him though. Told him she’ll be meeting him up at the usual place and adding crassly if he had a death wish. He texted back that he would be in the library revising for his long quiz for tomorrow if he had.

 

They were doing it in the basement of an abandoned discotheque on the sketchier side of town. There was a famous urban legend going on about the fire that occurred there twenty years ago that killed a hundred and fifty people due to the DJ box suddenly bursting into flames and then reaching the ceiling. They said you could hear the screams from the unfortunate buffoons that were trapped there.

 

He would not admit it out loud, but that was why he didn’t go to college parties.

 

His coach was at the entrance, hair in a high ponytail braid and wearing a fitted v-neck and jeans in case any fool attempted to touch her and get asswiped with that wicked roundhouse of hers.

 

She cocked an eyebrow at him when he approached, arms folding. “I could’ve come in your place.”

 

“Dunno if they will let you.”

 

“Could’ve lent you the money.”

 

“I don’t like owing anyone anything.”

 

“Which movie did you get that from? Pretty sure the guy who said that dies halfway or near the end,” she rolled her eyes. “You’re still not ready, dumbass. I could ask Mayuta to lend you some.”

 

“I thought you hated his ass.”

 

“Only after I was done eating it,” Miko then bit her lip. “Listen, pretty sure you’ll live, but rehabilitation’s a bitch. It’ll cost more than the usual.”

 

“Didn’t think you’d care this much, coach.”

 

Her eyes softened as he looked at her again before turning on her watch. “Just don’t get yourself too busted up tonight. I couldn’t score Mayuta’s car today. I can’t bring you to the hospital on a motorcycle.”

 

“It will be like the usual,” Ryo said, trying to sound cocky, but he ambled more than normal as they made their way to the back of the seemingly-deserted hellhole. He really needed to find a better part-time than tutoring moronic children on weekends.

 

“You said that last time when you broke your knee,” she said stiffly. “Don’t ditch me again, ayt?”

 

Ryo said nothing as Miko knocked on the door and pulled on the hoodie over his head. He was recognizable being the only blond in a sea of black and brown, and they didn’t need anymore attention before the fight.

* * *

 

It was no secret that Ryo Asuka’s moniker spoke volumes. Enough to be known, enough to be feared by these rabid dingoes.

 

Everyone expected the usual win tonight. But of course, they should have learned by now not to have expectations for anything. Fate was a bitch, unpredictable, bordering on unfairly psychotic. They should get used to it. If there was anything the world wouldn’t bother giving a shit about, then _ding, ding, ding,_ we have a winner over here.

 

So yeah, mainly it was him. The world revolved around him actually. He was once the morning star, goddammit.

 

When his accursed roommates found out, they asked him, with slack jaws filled with yellowing teeth, _why?_

 

He shrugged. He was a gambler. What has he got to lose?

 

Blood. A little bit of pride, maybe. More blood. Not much else.

 

He tried for varsity in college but found another scholarship to work part-time. He met Miko in track-and-field, still a senior and dating Mayuta at the time. Found out about the underground fighting circuit and how similar they both were, sorely sticking out from the rest of the upper-class student body. Mayuta tended to join during college, but turning corporate and splitting with her after graduation made him turn tail for good. Miko never cried. She had other things on her mind such as struggling to find work with a salary good enough to send her younger siblings to college.

 

His debut did not cement his addiction to fights, but the second one did. Oddly, the creator did not give him enough intellect or talent or parents like most of his old selves, but he did give him a mean right hook. He had a knack for beating the shit out of humans. He also did not get struck by lightning whenever he reassembled faces and broke limbs. Maybe He likes a good show of brutality as much as the rest of these pea brains. There was something animalistic and yet achingly human about that.

 

He cracked his gauzed knuckles for the nth time, cringing at the mild pain, and then repeating. It was a routine that made the thrumming in his hears lessen, made him focus on Miko’s instructions.

 

Letting his fists do the talking, mincing through their whoops and jeers, making his opponents writhe on the floor like the scum of the earth they were, helped him forget about him too. That last scenario as he cradled that piece of shit played like a loop in his dreams, working him up in a cold sweat as he catches Wamu in the dead of night nicking his instant noodles.

 

He was tired of it. He couldn’t understand why. Maybe it was this body’s fault.

 

“Feeling fine?” Miko asked as Ryo took off his hoodie, reducing his garments into a loose tank top and looser jeans this time to cover his bandaged knee.

 

“Guess.” Ryo honestly did not care. He just wanted to get it over with and go home with enough time to study and pass the exam, maybe. Blood was pulsing through his head. His back muscles rippled and were raring to go.

 

“When this is over and you don’t die, text me and let’s fucking train so that stunt of yours doesn’t happen again. Don’t give that shitty excuse of you having exams. I’ll find out from my underclassmen.”

 

“Yeah, I hate you, coach,” Ryo said as he twirled his shoulders and stretched out his arms. If there was one human being he actually gave one fuck about in this existence, maybe it was this crazy stupid fine amazon chick his roommates have a crush on. He smiled at her. It made her punch him in response.

 

“Good luck,” Miko said, pushing his back almost in prayer. He was too caught up in adrenaline to bother asking who his opponent was this time when he headed to the centre of the room filled with cardboard and rubber mats or what was supposed to be their makeshift ring. Everyone was ambling and pushing back, expecting, cheering, leering, he doesn’t give a shit. There was still some spattered blood there from an earlier fight. He could feel his ears throbbing again. He was ready to shut them up with another killing tonight.

 

The man that only seemed to be the referee was emerging to the middle of the ring, making the rest of the crowd lean back among the cracked and sooty walls, clad in mismatched jerseys and basketball shorts and a snapback from some university he sure doesn’t go to. It was almost comically unofficial but he commands authority, somewhat.

 

He never had a clue who he was going to fight. They just do and he manages somehow. That’s how the narrative usually goes.

 

But of course, God is always the ever-benevolent power tripper. He knew it when he could feel his knee acting up again so he carefully shifts his weight to his uninjured foot. He also knew that when he sees his opponent slowly walking toward the centre, hands unwrapped and the battle scars almost gleaming despite the dim light. He was taller than Ryo, head wrapped in a hood as well. He pulled off his sweater and Ryo inwardly groaned as God stabbed him in the back again with another cheap plot twist.

 

His head spun and he felt the full pain of his knee coming. He could barely make his legs obey as the ref motioned them to the centre. He expected nothing that night, maybe extra cash here and there, another cramming session that night, but not this.

 

“Lucifer, huh?” There was something special in his voice that made him feel shit he shouldn’t be feeling. An underbelly of regret and sadness and guilt and longing that he had long repressed but surfaced as fast as a fucking geyser in Yellowstone. “Dang, guess the rumours were true. You really look like a wuss.”

 

He couldn’t even pull out from his grand repertoire of insults anything as he looked at his opponent. Past was overlapping with the present and he couldn’t separate them in their desire to bleed together. He was still composed of angles- planar, geometric, fucking mathematical. He was more built than he was, and judging from his arms alone, had more power that he should avoid. He wanted to build up a strategy around him, make him pay for that diatribe.

 

Ryo’s mouth was quivering. “Akira,” he said, now unable to look at him. Does Akira remember everything? Does he know that once upon a time there was only one moon too when they both stared at it before the cycle resumed again?

 

His eyebrow twitched. He did not bother leaving any clothing in his upper half and made Ryo detest himself more for looking. This was the same Akira he ruined. Fucking Christ, now was the best time to be struck by lightning now. “Didn’t expect a bigshot like you to know my name. Thanks.” He was raising his fists now. Ryo felt like a fucking deer in the headlights. He couldn’t even strike a fighting stance. Shit.

 

Shit, again. He knew Miko was aware that things were not going to end well. Ryo clenched on his mouthpiece. Akira looked unaware, a brazen smile plastered on his face. This Akira wanted a piece of him. He should at least dance to his tune, this one bit. Put on a show that would literally knock the wind out of him. Step past his defences and make him pay for- for-

 

Shit again, ok. His vision was getting blurry. He couldn’t believe it, but a wave of extreme, unnatural emotion suddenly pours on him like a bucket of ice water. He was crying. Shit, he was actually tearing up.

 

This confused the hell out of those animals. They’re rabidly demanding that the ref clapped his hands or something to start the fight. They wanted to see red. Akira lowered his stance then as well, looking utterly bamboozled and concerned. He was probably expecting their showdown to be a tangle of limbs and destructive force and the sweet cathartic feeling of victory. This must be living a bitter taste in his mouth. So Ryo wiped his eyes and actually let that bastard in heaven make this more bearable because he just wanted to go home.

 

Their eyes locked. Ryo bit hard on his mouthguard. Akira grinned again and it made Ryo remember again. He couldn’t hear the rest anymore as the ref raised his right hand.

 

But that was all he remembered after that. It all happened in ten seconds, but he was on the ground, knee shattering, nose broken, left ear ringing. He was too busy remembering something else.

 

* * *

“Hey.”

 

It was Miko who first spoke when Ryo woke up. As if he didn’t nearly die the last time he was conscious, both physically and psychologically. _Hey_ , as if he wasn’t swollen like a melon. As if he was just fine.

 

He managed to move his head. The ceiling was white, but the rest of the interior wasn’t. The window looked old, complete with shell glass that glimmered like opals. He was in no hospital. He noticed an oil painting of an old woman in front of him too, surrounded by candles and that familiar idol of a baby Jesus, making him emit a scathing noise as he turned away. The bed creaked as he tried to sit up, only to feel his busted leg acting up again.

 

“Look,” Miko scratched her head in annoyance. “Something happened.”

 

Ryo was about to ask, but then a head popped out the door. _Oh no, it’s her._

 

“Akira, your friend’s awake!” she chirped as she turned outside.

 

“He’s not my friend! He’s my sworn rival!”

 

“Yeah, yeah, you say that to every guy friend you meet,” the girl scoffed, her brown her bouncing as she walked up at the bed, taking out a small torch and frying his eyes with light as she examined each eyeball. Ryo grumbled, but couldn’t complain out loud. He had proper etiquette at least. She then turned to Miko. “He’s fine, I guess? I can’t say anything about his knee though. You need to have that checked.” She then leaned closer to them, lowering her voice. “Sorry about Akira. He usually brings animals, not people for me to treat.”

 

“Ok, what the fuck just happened?” Ryo tried suppressing the grin on his face as he turned to Miko.

 

“Long story short, dude outside picked you up and attempted to run away with you. I chased them here. He demanded that his friend should take a look first.”

 

Ryo could only give her a wild look to prevent himself from pursing his lips at Akira’s gesture.

 

“Yeah, fuck you. I have to skip a day and pay your medical bills, you fucktard.”

 

“Eh, it’s fine. This was Akira’s fault,” the little extra bitch said, shaking her head repeatedly. “He’ll pay for it.”

 

“I’ll pay for it!”

 

“And that’s done. You should go to work now, miss,” she said in that familiar sunny way of hers at his coach, who could only blink at her, utterly bewildered. “We’ll take care of him. You can visit him later.”

 

Miko’s eyes darted at Ryo beadily.

 

“I won’t cause a scene, I promise,” he shrugged.

 

“Something tells me you wanted this to happen…” she glowered. “Eh, whatever. I’ll give you my number so you can text me if he does something funny. He tends to ugly cry when he loses-“

 

“I do not!”

 

“Peace out,” she said as she exited, leaving Ryo in making sure she gets his icy gaze.

 

“You’ll be safe here until she comes back. You’re lucky to have met her. She was fighting with Akira for you when he came here-“

 

“So who won?”

 

“It was a draw, I think? What did Akira do this time though? He told me he was out drinking last night-“

 

“I’ll take it from here, Miki,” he said, finally emerging from the deep. He was wearing a loose black shirt this time, covering himself. He was wearing a bandage just below his eye. He got a lick in surprisingly. He walked in silence and sat down by his right.

 

Neither of them spoke.

 

“Akira, can you ask your friend what he wants for breakfast?” Miki called out.

 

“I’ve been telling you that he’s not my friend!” he roared hoarsely before sitting down again.

 

Ryo smiled. This Akira was so similar to the one he remembered, down to the untameable hair up to those atrociously sultry eyes.

 

“What’s so funny? I beat you!” he grunted. This made Ryo laugh for real.

 

“You did,” he said, a wave of calmness settling in the pits of his stomach again. Suddenly, his knee wasn’t as unbearable as it was. He leaned on his pillows a bit more.

 

“Aren’t you pissed off? You weren’t in your best condition to fight me. It feels cheap.”

 

He said nothing, making Akira turn and lean closer to his face again. “I’ll beat you fair and square next time.”

 

“She’s right, you do sound like a kid,” Ryo laughed and for the first time in his life, he actually meant it.

 

“I-I’ll make you take that back when we face each other again!” he sputtered, trying to look threatening despite his fidgeting. “S-Say something manly too!”

 

God, don’t ruin this moment, you conniving bastard. “Ok, let’s… uh…” Shit, it was hard to keep a straight face in front of a mess like Akira. He burst out laughing again, just as that Miki came to ruin their moment and placed the tray of food on the table.

 

“Akira, since it’s your fault of bringing your friend here-“

 

“He’s not my friend!”

 

“Either way, he’s your responsibility, you freeloader!“ she stuck her tongue out before marching back, nodding at Ryo politely before shutting the door and making things more awkward.

 

“Looks like we’re friends then,” Ryo shrugged.

 

“I don’t think so.” Akira glowered before caving in again into his usual bubble of insecurities. “Uhm, I mean, if that’s ok with you.”

 

He really could not stop himself from smiling. Showing such vulnerability actually made him less disdainful of existing somewhat.

 

“That’s fine. I don’t think so too,” he said but not before hearing a terrible groan from his stomach.

 

“So… uhm, I’ll be feeding you. But this is temporary, ok? I don’t want you to have any ideas.”

 

“That’s fine too,” was all Ryo said as he pinched himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually the first DMCB fic I wanted to write, but couldn't get around to. Will be posting the other oneshots soon haha. I'm sorry for neglecting my fave ship XD


	2. II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akira was crazy stupid fine and Ryo was having none of that.

To put it in simple terms Ryo wanted to know whether Akira fucks harder than he hits.

 

He doesn’t say this out loud though. Nor does he attempt to entertain such thoughts as he remained lying down on the bed, Akira beside him, and that horrendous bitch in front of them with a clipboard in hand; hubris was dripping with every syllable coming out of her mouth.

 

“Anything else you’d like to say to your friend, Akira?”

 

“H-He’s not my friend!”  
  
  
_Jesus_ , Ryo avoided the gaze of the deformed baby filled with candles and incense a few feet away from the girl. He also made sure to avoid the array of crucifixes on the four sides of the room. He was no vampire, but the hierophanies littering the place solidified that godly presence further and made him want to vomit.

 

Both of them continued to fix their gaze to an Akira who was trembling in his seat. He clawed through his black shorts, his scrunched-up expression as he blinked back tears as familiar as how the array of trinkets and china and sculptures littering the room was unfamiliar to him. The grandfather clock behind Akira continued ticking away.

 

“I-I’m sorry for making you cry,” he said. “I- I didn’t mean to call you a wuss. You just didn’t look like the strong dude they told me you was.”

 

“Now, now, now,” the girl cooed as she began scribbling on her clipboard. “What do you want to say to Akira, Mister Lucifer?”

 

“That’s just my moniker,” Ryo said, unable to suppress his annoyance. He wanted to spend the rest of his time waiting for Miko with Akira, not helping this little bitch with her homework and turning Akira’s one-sided squabble into a therapy session. “It’s Ryo Asuka.”

 

“Ok then, Mister Asuka. What do you want to say to him?”

 

Akira was bawling his eyes out by then, both hands unable to stop the downpour of tears that were pelting on his shorts. Ryo wanted to sock him and tell him to get a grip, because he may have cried because of Akira, but it was for reasons this Akira cannot comprehend at the moment. Depending on his mood, maybe he won't tell him ever.

 

But if he was honest, it was more fun raining on his parade. So he does that. “I won’t forgive you.” Oh, how the roles have reversed. Take that, past Satan!

 

“Ehhh?” says the girl, looking at Ryo with that annoyingly condescending look of hers that screamed ‘how pitiful, even for the likes of fallen angels like you.’ “Why can’t you forgive him?”

 

“He broke my knee,” he said coolly.

 

“He cut my forehead!”

 

“Now, Now, Akira. Mister Asuka said you broke his knee. How will you address that?”

 

Ryo gave the most disdainful sneer he can muster as Akira was starting to lose his patience. He looked down again to sniffle his tears and then turned to Ryo with a stiff lower lip.

 

“I’m sorry for breaking your knee. I’ll drive you to the hospital when your friend comes back.”

 

The girl clapped her hands approvingly. “And?”

 

“I’ll be your obedient slave?”  


Ryo smirked at this. _It’s payback time, Akira._

“And?”

 

“I won’t call you a wuss again. Come on, Miki. That’s everything!”

 

“Is that everything, Mister Asuka?”

 

“He should remember that I did not cry because he insulted me. I wept because his existence itself is an insult.”

 

“Hmm… is that right?" There was that snobbish look of hers again. "I don’t think that’s true though based on what Miss Miko told me.”

 

Ryo nearly threw Akira at her direction. She was still a nuisance even on this plane.

 

“Then enlighten us please,” Ryo leered at her.

 

She turned to Akira. “You know what I mean, don’t you Akira?”

 

He could barely look at either of them. “Hell no.”

 

“I knew it!” Her smile was brighter than the torch she used on his eyes earlier. “And why not?”

 

“B-Because I want to fight Ryo again-“ Ryo felt his stomach whoop at the sound of his name from his lips. It reminded him of hallelujahs when it was still glorious to his ears. “And I might break his knee again.”

 

“Akira,” she said slowly. “If you do fight him again, will that make Mister Asuka happy?”

 

Ryo’s eyes widened when he met her gaze. _Damn, this bitch is good._  She understood him. How was she able to echo his sentiments perfectly?

 

He pretended to not have heard her. “Can we wrap this up already?”

 

“Oh right, right. Ok then, I hope in the oncoming weeks, we’ll be able to share our feelings with Miss Miko next time.”

 

“Wait,” this made Ryo pause. “Oncoming weeks?”

 

“Yes, seeing how you still-“

 

“Ok then, I forgive him. Happy?” he turned from them both. No way was he going to let this continue. “Write on your paper that we’re the best of friends or whatever, just let me get my shut-eye.”

 

“Are you sure, Mister Asuka?”

 

“Call me Ryo. Asuka’s just a bullshit name the child support services made up,” he added curtly.

 

“Wait so I can fight you-“

 

“No, I won’t be able to fight or walk properly for awhile, so if you’ll just _shut the fuck up_ -“ Ryo couldn’t finish his outburst when Miko popped her head outside the door. She covered her mouth to stop herself from laughing.

 

“Oops, bad time?” she asked.

 

Ryo merely covered his face with a pillow.

 

* * *

 

 

“The fuck was that?” Miko guffawed from the front seat.

 

“None of your business,” he retorted from behind them, folding his arms again as he tried to figure the best position for his busted knee.

 

“Yeah, sorry Miki can’t come with us. She has to pick up Taro from school.”

 

“Didn’t see your parents there…”

 

“Yeah, uncle and auntie work until late, so it’s usually just us until nine.”

 

“Wait, wait, wait, just a sec-“ Miko said. “You’re not her brother or something?”

 

“Yeah, we’re just friends. Our parents are pretty close…”

 

 _Tell me something I don’t know_ , Ryo said, ignoring them completely. Somehow, in this timeline, their dynamics were still similar to the other ones. She probably will still get in the way though, God’s special cock-block if he ever tried spinning this tale to his narrative. Their voices melded together and drifted away as he leaned back against the right window. Cars continued streaking until everything was a standstill and Akira had to step on the breaks.

 

He did not seem to be possessed by Amon just as Ryo’s body did not seem to be hiding some dormant powers. There were no traces of any demonic aura as well even when he had met Akira already. So this was it, huh? No apocalyptic showdown at the end like the usual? Maybe Akira’s insistence to fight him was an inevitable outcome God wanted them to have. He can just say no. Ignore and avoid Akira after this, no matter how brashly determined he was to fight him. Stay away from that bitch and that accursed house of theirs. His idle days of submitting to another inane existence will be tested soon.

 

They say that demons are masters of temptation. Jesus, they should try looking at the man upstairs. He made the idea of dodging fate sound like oblivion compared to his disyllabic name rolling around Akira’s mouth, reminding Ryo of hazy sunsets or bejewelled evenings slaying demons left and right. Like blood on teeth. Like salt and tears. Like light.

 

“Fuck!” Akira then roared as he honked at the car that squeezed by suddenly in front of them, and his invectives sounded like hallelujahs again. “What the fuck? Did you see that?” he turned at Miko.

 

“Welcome to third-world traffic, bitch,” Miko laughed. “Seems like we will be stuck in C5 for awhile. You ok out there, Ryo? I brought some fluids.”

 

The only fluid he wanted was the one coming from Akira’s- “Nah, I’m good.”

 

Oh father in heaven, why does Akira Fudo have to be such a thirst trap?  


* * *

 

“Just a grade II MCL sprain,” said the doctor three hours later when they managed to escape traffic and wheel a flushed Ryo to the orthopaedic. “With physiotherapy, you can be in tip-top shape after six weeks.”

 

Ryo inwardly groaned at this. “Can’t we slow the process?” It usually took twice as fast to heal with this body of his.

 

“That’s… Hmm… Anything I should be worried about? Are you in varsity? Nerves about the upcoming game?”

 

 _The longer the healing time, the slimmer the chances that I’ll be fighting Akira anytime soon._ “Yeah, something like that.”

 

“For psychological services, I’m afraid you have to check another type of doctor,” the doctor laughed, rubbing his goatee. Judging from his build, the doctor looked like a former athlete. Probably rowing or boxing.

 

“Nothing’s wrong with my head,” Ryo dismissed, adjusting his knee brace. Dammit, he thought that he’d end up having Grade III but God sure bestowed him such an awesome healing rate to lower it in less than a night.

 

By the time he left the doctor’s office, only Miko was on the painted wooden bench outside, sipping some protein shake.

 

“Akira left to fetch the car,” she said, standing up. “You need support or something?”

 

“I’m fine,” Ryo said, taking slow steps. “I’m thinking of ditching the rehab part. Hassle coming here, with the traffic and all that.”

 

“Akira’s paying though. I think he’s offering carpool too,” Miko then grinned. “Why? Afraid he’ll whoop your ass for real?”

 

“Fuck you,” Ryo scoffed. “You know on a good day I can wipe the floor with him.”

 

Miko shrugged and took off her blazer. “Dude lacks technique, but he’s raw talent. He packs a mean punch and kick too. His shin kick accidentally hit your knee, idiot.”

 

“I barely remember shit from that fight,” he trailed off.

 

“Yeah, looked like you lost before it even began,” she said, walking on pace with him. “So it’s him, huh?”

 

Women sure knew when to hit them hardest. “Yeah, that’s him.”

 

She grinned. “He’s one crazy stupid fine hunk of muscle, as your stupid roommates say.”

 

Ryo smiled. “I guess you can say that.”

 

“You were always like a fucking statue even during freshman year,” Miko laughed. “Figured… so you two had some history huh? The fuck did that asshole do to you? I’ll beat his ass.”

 

“It’s the other way around,” Ryo said, unable to utter anything else. “And he doesn’t remember any of it. But I do, which kinda sucks.”  


“What are you gonna do now?” Miko said. Both of them then took the elevator and continued to walk past the automatic doors, and outside the humid night air and onto the parking entrance. Sure enough, the Makimuras’ black Honda Civic was coming into view.

 

“Dunno, I never thought I’d see him again here.” There was still so much he could not understand within this new narrative God was presenting them.

 

“That must mean something then, right?” she said, just as the car skidded to a halt and a soft breeze began to blow.

 

“Ryo!” Akira wasted no time opening the door and helping him enter. “Until when’s your knee gonna heal, huh? Can’t wait to bash it again! I mean, if you know, we do face each other-”

 

He was starting to see why humans couldn’t avoid temptation. They look so beautiful even up close.  


* * *

  
Three days later and Ryo wanted to forget the whole thing as he hobbled to school. He ignored the streaming texts and missed calls that kept him and a screeching Gabi awake in the wee hours of the morning.

 

“Yo, Ryo!” said one of his annoying classmates, a mild-mannered fuck named Junichi. “What’s up with your leg? You ok?”

 

“Aren’t you supposed to be with Koda?” Ryo made sure to not even look at his direction as he began to pace out of their classroom and onto the library. It was difficult for him to ignore the small chapel to his left.

 

“Yeah, uhm, it’s just the project heads were asking you to come to the meeting this afternoon? You didn’t come last Friday, which is understandable with the accident and all-“

 

Shit, he forgot about that. He couldn’t bail either, given that he was the only person in the logistics team who was useful. He also needed this to translate for the extra service hours and retain his scholarship. “Are we meeting right now?”

 

“Yeah, at the Zen Garden? Lookie, there they are now…” There was a small group of people huddled just inches away from the large mahogany tree. They made sure not to be too close else a caterpillar swoops down to deliver itchy hell on any unfortunate soul.

 

But this was not what annoyed Ryo. He never did care about the org he joined in general. He only signed up because he cared jack shit about orgs during his three years in college, and given that he was a scholar, then it made sense to be part of that org and rake in extra service hours. He did not come into any events, and given that Miko forced him to at least _try_ and have a decent excuse for coming home and seeing those indolent mugs.

 

So why was Miki Makimura there? He looked around. Good, there was no Akira in sight.

 

“Hi, Ryo!” Everyone turned in his direction when the girl waved at him, all incredulous. This was his first time making an appearance, so it made sense that they would be wide-eyed and gaping like the dumb goldfish humans they were. “Looks like we’re on the same project huh? Which core are you?”

 

“Logistics…” He should at least pretend to be polite with all their eyes peering at him, these curious fucks.

 

“Oh, I’m in programs!” she chirped and soon the meeting was in session. Miki made sure to sit beside him though, and this pissed him off even more. He tried inching away to no avail. Their project heads were capable enough, talkative, made sure they had a ‘levelling off session’ by introducing themselves through a song (Ryo used ‘Royals’ because it was the only mainstream song he knew) and then made sure everyone knew their roles and updated them on their next tasks. It turned out that the event, the Scholar’s Party to Ryo’s horror, was in three weeks’ time.

 

“Make sure that everyone is present! We’ll be having live performances, free food, all that… Ryo, don’t forget about the decorations and the tokens ok? You don’t have to worry about the reservations since we have everything ready. Ok guys, thanks for coming! Good luck with acads and see you next week!”

 

Gosh, thank god that was over. He thought he was the first one to leave but forgot about his knee brace when Miki came to him in that shorts and sailor top get up.

 

“Ryo! How are you? Have you received Akira’s texts? He was really guilty of forcing you, you know.”

 

“Can we talk about this next week? I have to go home.” He wanted to ask where Akira was too because it was odd not to see any trace of him incognito with this girl. Even in death last time, he did choose her memory over his very-much-alive body.

 

“Uhm, we can go to my place to have dinner. Akira can drive you to your place-“

 

“Yeah, it’s pretty far from here. Two stations and a jeep ride away? I don’t think-“

 

“You can wait out the rush hour,” Miki said, getting her slimy hands on his left arm and making Ryo flinch. “Please?”

 

He stopped. His knee was aching too from the stress of being chased after by this she-beast. Plus there was something hypnotic about that look of hers. He never thought he’d be able to meet a human being with such transparent intention as her eyes showed. Heck, even Jesus wasn’t as pure as his religion perceived him as. “How far is your place?”

 

She cheered. “We can take the e-jeep. It’s not that far.”

 

It took them fifteen minutes to arrive, walking down the stairs five minutes away from the nearest station. The moss-eaten stairs were beside the school of Theology. He had classes there once, and he despised the robe-donned men that passed by to nod at their professor (who was also a priest, surprise). They passed by the guard, who nodded and thanked Miki as she handed him a chocolate bar and Gatorade. They made their way past the narrow pathways of the small and large housing community before reaching the main road. Sure enough, they reached the ancestral house (“This was my grandparents’ from my mom’s side”). Ryo made sure to avoid the pictures of the saints that gazed at him surreptitiously when he took off his shoes and entered.

 

“Miki! I’m having trouble with the soup- Ryo? What- How?” Akira was wearing an apron with a large pink heart across his chest area. His hair was smoothed back and tamed by a tied bandana. “So… you came to accept my challenge, huh? Let’s do this outside.”

 

“He’s only here for dinner, Akira,” Miki shooed him away and took off his apron before skidding past. He heard a small squeak of ‘Sis!’ which probably came from her little brother. “Geez, what did you do this time-“

 

“I only came to wait out the rush hour,” Ryo said as he ambled past. He reeked of cologne. He felt guilty for sniffing again.

 

“Wait- but how did Miki-“

 

“We’re from the same uni, unfortunately,” he said, not bothering to hide his distaste for their situation. “I was surprised. I thought you’d also be-“

 

“It’s my summer break. My uni’s back in Canada. I’m only sticking around for two months, more or less.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Yeah,” Akira said, putting his hands on his pockets. “How long until your knee heals?”

 

“Six weeks, more or less.”

 

“Yeah, you still have time for conditioning then. Prepare yourself!” he said, sending several blows against air and making his hair blow a little. Miko was right. He had talent. Maybe he can graduate this street-fighting he’s doing. He can fight on a larger scale. Ryo smiled at this.

 

Akira noticed. “What? You think I’m a joke?”

 

He really needed to work on his happy expressions. “Uh, no. Maybe you’re right. You might defeat me for real if we do square off again.”

 

“You don’t have to lie, man. You never sound convincing-“ Akira stopped his display and then leaned his face several inches from his. He was always ignorant of tension, sexual or otherwise. This was getting more troublesome, especially for Ryo who was more than ever willing to take the high road and avoid making his and Akira’s life another shit show for the people upstairs to enjoy. “Gosh,” he exclaimed as he turned away. “You really don’t look like the strongest fighter they tell me about! You’re too pretty!”

 

How Akira said that with a straight face was beyond him. Ryo could suddenly feel the temperature shoot up by twenty degrees. “Get off me, asshole.”

 

This sudden display of defensiveness made the taller man grin. “Guess you have to make me.” He continued leaning closer to him, and it pissed Ryo off because he was sure as hell that heaven was losing their shit right now. _Do it, do it, do it…_ they must be chanting.

 

Ryo couldn’t believe that he was doing this. He kicked Akira between his pants and sent him tumbling down like a tree. “There,” he said triumphantly. “You should know that anything goes if you ever do try facing people like me.”

 

“You-“ Akira howled, now struggling to stand up and readying his stance again. Fuck, even this incarnation doesn’t know how to quit. “Are gonna fucking pay-“

 

He threw a punch and to Ryo’s surprise, he managed to evade. Akira threw another, to which he parried just in time before he attempted to land a straight. This was easy. All he needed was a counter-

 

It lasted only an instant. An image flashed of a possessed Akira cradling the head of Miki. This froze Ryo long enough for another punch to reel at him from nowhere, making him fall down ungracefully. Shit. Why? Fuck, seriously, what the heck-

 

“What the fuck man, why the fuck did you stop-“ Son of a bitch managed to graze his jaw. Even Akira noticed it. Ryo laughed darkly. Some handicap, God. He might not be able to beat Akira this time. There was too much baggage in facing him. “Hey, shit-“

 

The asshole managed to catch him on time. He also helped him get a seat on the dining table and ran to get some ice.

 

Miki was having none of it when she found out. She continued berating Akira during dinner. This was the first time he ever saw her this angry. It ruined his ego more because she was on his side, what the hell.

 

Ryo could not even find himself to get pissed off at her as he cradled the ice pack in one hand and shovelled food in his mouth with the other. Her little brother with his snapback kept staring at him as he ate.

 

He couldn’t find himself having the energy to wait for Akira to drive him as he hailed a jeep to the train home. He could feel a sudden drop of weights falling down on his shoulders all the way up to his back. It was a good thing there were open seats for him to stumble onto. He forgot the ice had melted by the time he arrived home and collapsed on his bed, ignoring his two roommates on the couch, who, for the first time in their wretched lives, actually asked him if he was okay.

 

He did not know then in meeting Akira how he would feel. But now, as he ignored his calls and dialled Miko’s number, he was able to understand. There might be no end to this. And maybe he just wanted to end it. If not this story, then maybe his own.

 

The phone clicked. “Yeah, what’s up Ryo?”

 

“Do you think free will exists?”

 

“Uh… the fuck happened man? You saw Akira again?”

 

“You didn’t need to ask,” Ryo’s smile was forced like the usual. “Dunno, just wondering, I mean, if God does exist and everything happens for a reason like you said, should free will even exist?”

 

“Gosh, from the sound of it, you’re skipping your Philosophy classes, huh?” Miko laughed. “Dunno about the God existing part, there are only so many theistic arguments mentioned during class,” she paused. “Dunno, you can say to reconcile that idea, maybe he created free will for us?”

 

“Don’t you think that just makes things worse? More shitty ways to destroy the planet, or ourselves, if we’re realistic.”

 

“Yeah, we’re all pieces of shit, one way or another,” she tittered again. “But you know, god or no god, I guess you can say that there’s a part of me that believes I can’t be a piece of shit forever. Maybe that’s the reason if God does exist, that he lets us make a ton of terrible decisions right? Maybe He believes like the rest of us does: That things can get better. That we can be better.”

 

“I can’t believe you’re a fucking idealist. Just proves you’re human,” Ryo said, looking up at the smog-ridden orange sky by his window. There were still some scattered stars visible.

 

“You’re human too. Living, breathing. Having a crush on the sexiest man alive-“ Both of them chuckled at this. “There’s still a chance for you to wake up tomorrow. Maybe then it will get better. Dunno, I try to make the best that I can. I mean, at the end of the day, I don’t have a choice but to make the most out of what I have, right? I can’t give up, man. I mean, I still want to whoop your ass when your knee’s ok.”

 

“I can’t believe a human like you exists.”

 

Miko laughed again. “Too naive, Ryo. You’re just not looking hard enough.” She then hung up.

 

Ryo looked at his messages again. Akira. Some unknown number with messages littered with apologies. Probably Makimura. Junichi and his project heads bidding good luck to him. He then pressed Akira’s number and waited. His chest was pounding. Was that good? Was that too much? There was a curiosity that began to blossom. Dunno what it will bloom into, but might as well try letting it.

 

“Hi,” Ryo did not wait for his greeting. “After class, let’s meet up outside the Makimura residence. Yeah. Ok, see you.”

 

Does Akira fuck harder than he hits? He will soon find out.

* * *

_Don’t you wish you could go inside a heart, see the strings and atriums, everything beating and bleeding. It’s kind of funny, I spend almost every minute thinking about love. Being guided, and divided by love. But I’ve never seen it. It’s just a rumour, a comedown, an afterglow. I wanna see it, in colour. In the summer, I can almost picture it. The sky is bursting, blushing, darkening. A shimmer on the water - your skin, and my skin. The flowers. I sip the drink, I lie to you, I go to secret worlds. You call the car, you tell the truth, you pull me in. Are we blessed? Or cursed? Do we make love or do we destroy it? That summer I wanted to find out._

_Lorde -  Interlude 1_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Dropping random ‘edgy’ quotes even tho the fic ain’t even? Meow meow, bitch.
> 
> *This fic was inspired by my time in uni, which was also a Catholic school so I figured it would be a laugh if Ryo gets stressed out from his Theology classes hehe. 
> 
> *BTW thank you for the feedback! :O Really did not expect this much love HAHA. Allow me to indulge myself further XD 
> 
> P.S. If you are anons, I'd want to talk to you so please, please, please use your accounts to comment T_T


	3. III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryo had the final laugh. Or did he?

_But what’s really ridiculous is how we’re always thinking of_

_something else,_

_And we’re always outside_ it, _because we’re here._  


_-20 April 1919/Pessoa, Fernando/A Little Larger Than the Entire Universe  
_

* * *

  
Since meeting Akira, Ryo had learned how to dream. Preferably Akira without his clothes off like all those godawful art pieces found on blogging sites. It was a common sight on Miko’s phone before she graduated and had extra time to kill and browse during training. Hell could use some tips regarding the seemingly endless possibilities of human imagination.

 

The discordant memories as well interfere with these flights of fancy. Apparently, the creator wants him to remember that he could not have it all as long as he remained within the confines of the flesh. He could still remember Akira’s bisected body in all iterations, and he wonders greatly why his past incarnations had such limited vision, especially when it came to killing Akira. Can’t they at least hung, drawn, and quartered him? What about setting fiend fire on him? Pulling out his heart and other innards and crushing them slowly? Crushing him against cooling igneous? Leaving him outside a dying sun and letting demonic birds peck at his liver? He could have gotten tips at human mythology, with their gross repertoire of capital punishment.

 

Once again, God has pushed his buttons by making him see how limited his past lives had been in making grand use of his gifts. Or at least, make him see how dependent he was in wearing white or trenches.

 

“Yeah, definitely ditch the boots,” said Miko when Ryo showed him his selfie under locked doors in case either Gabi or Wamu catch him playing dress up those uncouth pieces of shit. “I like the pastel shades. Nice touch.”

 

“You think that idiot will notice?” Ryo rolled his eyes. Even in past incarnations, Akira never really gave a damn about his appearance, preferring either opened or close-buttoned polos or crew necks. Even this Akira loved wearing black under the balmy weather.

 

“Dunno, pretty sure he won’t,” Miko coughed back a laugh. “I don’t suggest you wear white shoes though. It might rain tomorrow.”

 

Ryo stared at the three pairs of white shoes and slip-ons he possessed. “Maybe God would care if I pray hard enough.” He can’t believe he just said that. This Akira was working wonders in restoring his faith in the Lord. The only thing missing is he attend the university masses every first Wednesday of the month.

 

“I can’t believe you just said that after all those rants about removing Theology from the core curriculum,” Miko yawned. “You’ve fallen so hard, dude. Careful, don’t want him to step all over you.”

 

Honestly, Ryo doesn’t know why he was even trying. This Akira definitely had no idea about their beef. He also did not possess the same ‘my buddy Ryo’ vibes with that widely comical smile of his and his soft voice. He was brazen, short-fused, and dangerously confident about his ability to charm the hell out of him. He was also a big fat blockhead which definitely did not help.

 

“Yeah, dead air. Talk to you later after work. Don’t forget to ditch that expression where you space out and grin like a homicidal maniac. Good night.”

 

Dammit, he really needed to watch more Youtube how-to’s on how to smile.  


* * *

 

“There’s something on your face,” Wamu said during breakfast. “There’s a goofy grin where your scowl should be. You know what they say: When Ryo smiles, a puppy dies.”

 

Ryo had already showered and dressed up appropriately for later. He responded in kind by ignoring Wamu’s attempts of egging him on to spill, his middle finger blatantly poised on his empty hand as he continued to spoon more rice.

 

“Who’s the lucky chick?” prodded Gabi further as he rifled through his papers of readings while slurping on his instant noodles. He had bags under his eyes as well and did not get on the top bunk last night.

 

“None of your business,” Ryo said, browsing through his phone. He stopped when his two room mates’ eyes leered at him.

 

“Called it. You owe me barbecue later,“ he turned to a dejected Wamu, who waved it off as he fished out his nearly empty wallet. “Spill man! You took more time in the shower than usual.”

 

“Why do you make such a big deal out of it?” He did not get why they were sporting big grins on their faces at the shallowest things.

 

“Knew it!” They gave each other a high five before fixing their attention to Ryo again.  “You never tell us anything, that’s why!”

 

Ryo cracked. He knew they will keep pressing his buttons anyway. “It’s just a meeting. Nothing special.”

 

“Meeting, and you’re wearing something other than white for once,” Gabi said matter-of-factly. “You ain’t fooling anyone, man.”

 

“Tell us how it goes, yeah?” Wamu said, flicking his hat at him. “Oh shit, I can’t be here tonight. Gabi can tell me.”

 

“Jeez, out in your usual ventures?” Gabi turned at him, making Ryo finish his meal at top speed in case their short attention spans fix on him again.

 

“I got a guy who’ll definitely get us in a record deal this time, for real man!”

 

“You sure this ain’t another one of those crappy variety shows to humiliate you again? Remember the time we performed and didn’t get in the finals because we can’t do the original one in the actual live show and had to make one up?”

 

“Wait, speak of the devil, we’re still not done grilling Ryo-“

 

Too late. Ryo was already done putting on the white Moonstar slip-ons Miko gave him on his last birthday and dashed out the door. He ended up knocking again though. He forgot his knapsack and large purple shades to go with his denim jacket and grey chinos.

 

* * *

 

 

To beat the morning rush hour and the time Wamu and Gabi hogged the shower, Ryo normally left home at 5:30 to take a jeep ride to the train station. It was normally a milky blue or a pastel orange that will turn either a shade of gray with showers or a cloudy periwinkle before he drops off outside the metal gates near the blue and white foot bridge at the school.

 

It was a good thing that trees abound the brick road going to one of the buildings, otherwise he knew the denim jacket would be in his little locker by now. He tried to avoid as many gaggle of girls as possible in case that little bitch shoes up to steal his thunder. He also had difficulty getting past his white-haired teacher’s sultry voice in western history class as he began drawing up plenty of scenarios in his notebook. He would meet Akira at lunch, in the school of theology near the stairs leading to the Makimura residence.

 

He had consulted Youtube in the wee hours of the morning for possible positions and even woke up a groggy Miko to inquire about her past conquests, making his coach choke on her own spit and nearly wake up the entire neighbourhood because she couldn’t stop laughing. It wasn’t his fault for lacking time to rut people left and right throughout his cycles. Sexual promiscuity was frowned upon if it was an end in itself and not a means. Human flesh wasn’t also up to his taste, nor were the corporeal. Akira was always the exemption, no matter what time or space his matter occupies, preferably his own.

 

Motherfucker. He nearly tore out his hair as he rode the e-jeep and saw Akira’s text that he forgot his ID and had to return home. He will be late by five minutes, he said with a quick sticker of apologies. Ryo was no fan of tardiness, no matter what the excuse, but this managed to calm him down. He did not know how to approach their possible meeting later. His knee was tingling again. He had to sit down at the waiting shed, drinking gin from his water bottle to calm his nerves. This was pissing him off; how he could not blame even God Himself for perpetuating his current mental state of disarray. _He_ set up this meeting. He had to make sure it goes smoothly, with them fucking somewhere. He was the bad man this time, and as for how bad he is, Akira will discover soon enough.

 

He then received a text and nearly threw out the second-hand iPhone 5S he bought three years ago. Asshole just asked him to go to the Makimura residence and help him look for a computer shop. Apparently, he needed better connection speed for a video call.

* * *

 

 “Yo, what’s with the get up? Is there a special event you need to go to after this?”

 

He wondered how the hell he was still able to keep a straight face even when Akira was just wearing his usual all-black ensemble and slippers without a care in the world. Plus they were half an hour behind schedule. He should be fucking Akira by now on the ST’s rooftop.

 

Ryo was trying his best not to hit him and ensure another duel where he’d lose to his own unwelcome flashbacks again. “I dunno this area, but you can use the school WiFi. I have my laptop. Let’s go back and take the e-jeep.” Either way, they can go to the mini-forest behind the management school building and rut there. He’d want Akira to bray so loudly, the students passing by would swear Baphomet made his humble abode just behind the large wattle.

 

“Gee, you’re pretty swell,” said Akira, ruffling his waxed hair he meticulously styled even before entering the e-jeep. “You sure though? Don’t want to grab food on the way?”

 

“Let’s just get this over with,” Ryo sighed and fought the urge to smother his lips.

 

Sure enough, both of them were dropped off in the art department building near the small church. Ryo made sure to ignore Akira as he crossed himself, filling up his water bottle from the nearest fountain before walking up to the array of stone benches near the library instead once he noticed a short girl with a brown pixie cut in front of them going to the management building.

 

They chose the bench that was safe from the noonday sun as Ryo pulled open his laptop and let Akira input his account details. Ryo made sure to take note of his hands in case he needed to look at them later.

 

“I’ll delete my browser history after this, just in case.” Or not. This fucker’s not as dumb as his incarnations at least.

 

“Who are you calling?” Ryo asked as Akira plugged in earphones. All around, students were starting to flood the pathways as they either raced to the library or to another food stop that passed by the library and into the management school’s forest.

 

“Oh, my parents,” Akira scratched his head rather sheepishly. “They were asking me to call them, but the signal at Miki’s place is pretty lousy.”

 

Right, this incarnation’s parents were alive and had a healthy relationship with the man in front of him. Ryo’s lips curled at this.

 

“Yeah, sorry Ryo. I’ll make this quick so you can also go to your event too. Wouldn’t want to ruin your day with that get-up- Oh, hey mom!”

 

Ryo stood and sat on the bench opposite him. Akira just looked on and began fumbling with his earphone cord.

 

“Yeah, Miki’s still in class, I think? She said she’d be busy today. Uh, I’m at their uni right now, actually. Yeah, I’m with uhm, I don’t think we’re friends. We’re rivals, I guess? Yeah, uh-“ he took out one earphone and peered at Ryo’s direction. “Eh, can you go and say hi? My parents may think I’m lumbering by myself again, sorry about this-“

 

It was the first time in awhile since Ryo actually saw Kaori and Reijiro Fudo. Like this Akira, their iteration remained unchanged, sans their lab coats. Both of their eyes widened at eye contact.

 

“Miss… Ryo?” his mother said.

 

“No,” Ryo said, making Akira guffaw and his parents smack themselves in embarrassment.

 

“Sorry about that, Ryo. Akira told us about you. He’s right about the pretty part, sorry-“

 

Well, he knew where he got the candidness from. Ryo felt his face turn hot when he realized Akira lent him the wrong earphone and their cheeks were now closer together.

 

“We apologize if Akira caused you trouble,” Reijiro continued. “He only had Miki as a friend even when he was here. He tends to believe all the boys he meets are his rivals, still a kid… I told you Kaori, we shouldn’t have spoiled Akira too much!”

 

“Eh, touché dear. You were the one who didn’t tell me right away that Akira would be visiting Miki-“

 

“D- Don’t argue on the computer geez…” Akira sputtered. “I’m not a kid anymore and you’re embarrassing me in front of Ryo-“

 

Ryo could only clamp down his lips to prevent himself from chortling too much. They looked so normal and mundane.

 

“Really? Aren’t you an embarrassment already by boxing Ryo in such a role? He looks like such a sweet child.”

 

Oh he’ll definitely give their son something sweet when this is over and done with. “I don’t really care what he thinks of me,” Ryo tried putting his Youtube watching to good use by smiling. The Fudos stared at him as if he had just uttered a curse.

 

“Eh, looks like we’re hogging too much of your time. You should invite Ryo over with Miki to dinner. Are you eating well, dear?”

 

He shuddered at the d-word because it wasn’t the d one he wanted. “Enough.” His diet consisted of instant noodles or fast food or Miko’s treat whenever they won a match.

 

“Next time, Akira will treat you. Look out for our boy, alright? He doesn’t even know how to make his bed or iron his clothes properly, our good-for-nothing child-“

 

“Mom! Dad!”

 

“Ok bye… We’ll add you on Facebook, ok Ryo dear? We’d want to share Akira’s baby pictures-“

 

“I would love to see that,” Ryo said in diabolical glee as they hung up. He now had a good reason to use his Facebook again aside from scrolling through memes or posting inane birthday messages for networking.

 

Akira looked like he aged two centuries. He slowly began rolling back his earphones.

 

“Sorry you had to take part in this. They like it that I’m with someone other than Miki.”

 

“Some sorry existence you must have had,” Ryo snorted. “Did you also have fisticuffs in Canada when you were little?”

 

“Nah, only did impromptu matches with some bullies. I was a sickly kid then. Decided to toughen up and took some boxing classes until I finished third year in high school. Miki was the only one who cared until she moved back here because of her parents.”

 

“How did you know about me or the circuit?”

 

“Uh, I asked around. Got bored at Miki’s. Wanted to pick that up again, to get my blood pumping y’know? I was lucky enough to be paired up with you on my first try.” Akira then scratched his nose. “Wish you put up a fight though. Pretty disappointing for a debut match.”

 

“You-“

 

Before Ryo could think of a possible insult, his stomach sunk when he heard that familiar voice calling out his name. There was the scrubby Jun, wearing his navy PE shirt with a much taller man in short dreads, lumbering beside him. Well shit, just when he thought he’d make it-

 

“Hiya! Are you Ryo’s friend,” Jun waved at them. Ryo returned his laptop back at his bag and inwardly groaned. He hated people, especially when he had to make an effort to initiate shit. Akira looked at him, eyes sparkling.

 

“Akira, this is Junichi. He and I are in the same club as Miki.” Koda looked on expectantly, waiting for his introduction. Ryo proceeded to crush his hopes by ignoring him completely and bidding a goodbye to Junichi.

 

“Hey! You forgot me!”

 

He rolled his eyes. “Right, this is annoying,” he pointed with a thumb and did not bother to even turn. “You should even forget I mentioned him. He’s no one of import.”

 

Koda made a strangling noise. Junichi made sure to elbow his ribs. “Quit it, Moyuru. You always act like a kid when Ryo’s around…”

 

“Don’t pretend you’re my mom, geez-“

 

“Y-Yeah, see you later, Ryo. Nice to meet you as well Akira. Enjoy your date!”

 

That innocuous greeting was enough for Ryo to turn at Junichi, who was surprised as well when Ryo made his way forward.

 

“It’s not a date,” he said matter-of-factly.

 

“Ah, it isn’t? Sorry, it’s just you’re dressed up more than usual-“

 

“It’s not,” Ryo interjected. But Koda understood and a wide mischievous grin replaced his less stupid scowl. _Oh. I let the human tendency to make a big deal of minor grievances get the best of me._ Now he was more than annoyed when Koda fitted his hands in his pockets and walked in front of Akira, who cocked an eyebrow at him, hands balled up into fists.

 

“Cocky are we to have Lucifer around, eh?” he said, that cocky smirk of his filling every nook and cranny of his mouth as he scrutinized Akira. “Heard you did the unthinkable and beat him senseless.”

 

That hit a nerve with Ryo’s limited human consciousness. But what made him move to scatter these two hot-headed hormonal fools was Akira responding with a bigger leer.

 

“Man, it must suck to be one of the losers who couldn’t.”

 

It took a three-second lag for Koda to react, but that was enough for Ryo to rush between them and lightly tap both their temples with the back of his palms before anyone knew what happened. Before Akira could say anything else, Ryo already signalled Akira to follow him away.

 

“I-I’ll have my revenge when we face each other again!” said Koda and earned him another elbow from Junichi.

 

“You knew he was a fighter too?” Ryo said as Akira massaged the place Ryo targeted earlier.

 

“Figured with how he called you. Wait, how did you do that? I thought your knee was-“

 

“That idiot has a habit of using his right first so I went on ahead,” Ryo dismissed. His knee was healing faster than he anticipated. He would be able to fully heal it in less than a month. “You didn’t have to provoke him. He’s not worth a smidge of our attention-”

 

“You fought him?”

 

“Several times, yeah. A total sour grape. He was the one who did this,” Ryo grunted, pointing at his knee.

 

“How’s his record?

 

“I’m the only person who he’s ever lost too, I think.”

 

Akira stopped in his tracks.

 

“I want to fight him.”

 

“Yeah… it doesn’t actually work that way. The fights are pretty random. You don’t get to choose-“

 

“I want to _kill_ him.”

 

“That’s going too far, Akira.”

 

He was shedding tears of rage. Even Ryo distanced himself a little.

 

“He broke your knee.”

 

“That’s how it goes.”

 

“H-He’s the reason why I couldn’t beat you fair and square!”

 

“We don’t even know if you can beat me, you smug piece of shit,” Ryo snapped. “You were just lucky to get me on a bad day.” _Plus you are the only human I actually gave two fucks about to complicate it further so-_

“You don’t think that I can beat him?”

 

“He won’t be easy,” Ryo said. “He’s no amateur like you. He’s been in the circuit far longer than me.” Based on his limited interactions with Junichi, he believes he only knew Koda due to their similar core history classes.

 

“Train me then.”

 

“What? You’re fucking nuts right now.” Ryo couldn’t bother filtering his mouth anymore.

 

“I want to beat that shithead senseless!” Akira said. “Plus he insulted you. Thinks you’re my bitch. You can’t possibly have dressed nicely because of me. You have an event to attend after school, right?”

 

His head was hurting. He really wanted to kick the hell out of Akira, but that would only invite him further for a future square-off so he ignored him.

 

“You should do this more often. Wearing only white clothes isn’t really inviting with the shit you’ll be walking under while going home.”

 

“Beats the heat compared to wearing all black,” Ryo jabbed at his fashion sense, making Akira laugh in response.

 

“Yeah, seriously. The heat makes me seriously consider stripping-“

 

“Do it- uh, do it when we go home-“ Ryo said quickly. Asshole must not know his saintly intentions.

 

Akira laughed again. “Yeah, might take a really cold bath when I go home. Uh, and sorry about the shit I said to Junichi’s friend. Not like I really beat you, I mean- Yeah, there’s a ton of stuff I still need to learn. Maybe you and that pretty girlfriend of yours-“

 

“She’s just my trainer,” Ryo clarified.

 

“Yeah, maybe you and she can help,” he gulped. “I mean, maybe there would be a dark tournament and I have to fight these guys so I can fight you again-“

 

“You watch too many cartoons,” Ryo snorted. “You can fight whoever you want. It doesn’t matter. Pretty sure Koda would also want to face you next. Both of you are too fucking alike.” Yeah in gait and demeanour, but Ryo didn’t give a fuck about Koda and would be glad to put him into eternal sleep if he did not fear God striking him down before he could screw Akira.

 

He looked at his phone. As much as he wanted to skip classes, finals were coming up.

 

“I’ll take you back to the Makimuras. I still have classes so-“

 

“Promise me you’d train me.”

 

“I don’t have time to give into this-“

 

“I won’t bug you in fighting me again and I’ll add in a ticket to the latest MCU film-“

 

“IMAX and Director’s Lounge. You’ll also cover the snacks and transport.”

 

“Shit, I want us training three times a week for three weeks with daily roadwork after your classes.”

 

“You’ll also cover this month’s rent for me and my flatmates.” So sweet, goddamn. This is better than having a one-noonday stand with this asshole.

 

“What the fuck, Ryo?”

 

“Deposit will be due in two weeks. Makimura also told me you’re doing a terrible job in tutoring Taro. I’ll take over from there until you return to Canada.” Plus he can charge extra to Makimura and have a new source of income aside from his weekend tutorial sessions.

 

“Something tells me I’m biting more than I could chew…”

 

“Well, you want the best underground fighter covering your ass, right?” Ryo grinned. “I’m making your life easier. What more can you ask for?” Hidden charges also abound, of course, such as the after-training meal. No KFC or McDonalds for three weeks, baby!

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to update! RL obligations had been piling up, plus I ended up trimming this part. This chapter initially had a lot more going for it but yeah, once more time constraints urk


	4. IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryo cries again.

_Every day I_ _count all the things I could lose_   
_and then I lose them again_   
_Echo on the train station tiles_   
_As if your sins didn’t happen_   
_I do not forgive easily without a god_   
_— Lauren Eggert-Crowe, from ESTIVATION OFFERINGS, published in Big Lucks_

 

  
Miko texted Ryo after classes and asked if he was free for a visit at Gelmer’s. Naturally, Ryo turned her down due to the impending orals in two weeks’ time and he still hasn’t gone through his readings to make up drivel for his theology professor. He may dislike him and his conservative views befitting the textbook priest, but he was still a damn Jesuit and he liked the thought of using that oxymoron to describe the legendary prof he dared taking for Marriage, Life, and Sexuality.

 

“I’ll treat you,” Miko fired. The stakes were on. “And tomorrow, and the day after that.”

 

“Pass,” Ryo yawned. “I’ve only met Akira for four days and he made a much better offer than a friend I’ve known for three years.”

 

“He has an advantage because someone has a crush on him,” she said, clicking her tongue impatiently. “Besides, I need a serving of nitty gritty with good old beer or vodka, the cheapest of course, your majesty-“

 

Ryo waited for that smidge of flattery before interrupting. “I’m really kinda busy right now. That damn father’s my prof and I don’t want an F on my last orals.”

 

“It was your fault for getting him during enlistment.”

 

“It was either him or that annoying red-head bitch-“

 

“You’re messing up with me again, you asshole. I need someone to vent to. Work’s too much to handle right now and I’m the only one not doing vape-“

 

Ryo pursed his lips. Normally, he’d turn off the phone already but a drunk Miko was a negotiable Miko. In order to get Akira to save his diet for the next three weeks, he had to swallow whatever egocentric thought he had and place his faith in cramming enough information come the weekend. Shit, he forgot that he scheduled his buying of materials that time.

 

“Meet me there before nine.” The library closes at 8:30 and he can ask Miko to pay for his tricycle fee.

 

\--

“You are a fucking pussy, Ryo Asuka.” In another life, Miko would be a pillar of salt or bisected if she ever tried insulting him. She downed her eighth bottle of beer. “You. Are. A. Puss-y-“

 

“Your colleague was staring at your ass throughout work and you never even socked him,” Ryo grunted as he ran through Aquinas’ teleological arguments while he sipped his first and only beer. All around them under the dim fairy lights, college students who believed there was a God who gave curves without consequence continued their Dionysian banter and fuckery as they sloshed through the final months of the semester.

 

“Fucking pig. Pig- pig- pig- I wish I fucking popped an apple in his mouth and a stick in his ass. He’d be of fucking use then, filling my fucking stomach, son of a bishh-“

 

Good. She was getting tipsy. Just one more bottle and she’d be grovelling at his whims by now.

 

“There’s also this fucking hippo-byatch who’s spreading this rumour that I got back with Mayuta. Fuck her, can’t even believe her hubby still keeps up with that mug of hers. Ok, sure that’s fucking petty, but her personality’s not even worth sticking with. I heard from Hiei, you know, my cellmate, my only confidante in that entire twenty-floor building that no ‘friend’ sticks with them too long. There was a time-“

 

He successfully filtered out the bullshit and waited for her to drink her next bottle before he struck.

 

“Me too. This day kinda sucked.”

 

Miko withdrew her lips and eyed him suspiciously.

 

“You’re making small talk.”

 

Shit, she was waiting for this. All a fucking ruse. Ryo swallowed.

 

“You never start unless you want something,” Miko dipped two fries into garlic mayo before looking up at him.

 

“What are you talking about?” he blinked.

 

“Cut the bullshit. You think our three-year friendship was for nothing? Look, whatever that favour will be, just make sure it doesn’t involve Mayuta and snapdragons.”

 

Miko’s eyes were still alive underneath all the alcohol as she smirked at Ryo as her own congratulations for backing him into a corner. He folded his arms and leaned back at the cold unpainted cement wall.

 

“I want you to train Akira.”

 

“Oh my god, so you went all the way?”

 

“If we went all the way, my phone would have been on silent,” Ryo snapped. Miko’s face soured.

“Jesus Christ Ryo, what did you do? I thought you got this.”

 

“It was that son of a bitch’s fault. I do not get why keeps throwing a wrench on my plans. Look, somehow I got to meet his parents-“

 

“So you’re asking for their blessing huh?”

 

“You already know gay marriage is still illegal here and we were inside a Catholic institution, for crying out loud, Miko-“

 

“You always take everything seriously, geez. So what, you admitted your feelings or something or said something with suggestive foreplay like, _Oh dearest Akira, train with me. I can’t face my demons alone- I need you to bring me to Canada so I can buy those Louboutin heels and attend the MET gala-_ “

 

“Junichi came with Koda and a fight nearly broke out between that idiot and my idiot-“

 

“Oh, so we’re using possessive pronouns now-“

 

“I managed to stop them. Akira made a proposition where he will fight Koda in three weeks’ time and treat me to wherever I wish.”

 

Miko took awhile to respond. Her eyes were alert again as she examined him closely.

 

“You’ll also be tutoring Makimura’s brother?”

 

“Your gift of telepathy eludes me.”

 

“And your deadpan delivery merits a fucking Oscar,” Miko jabbed more fries at her mouth and chewed them rather vehemently. “Damn, I mean you actually had him and you didn’t make the most out of it.”

 

“I didn’t,” Ryo said without looking up as he finished highlighting his second to the last argument. “Whatever, I’ll just fuck him in the lockers or shower or even in front of the shrine of Makimura’s grandmother-“

 

“Wait, let me get this straight. So what happens if you do fuck him? Just a one night stand or something?”

 

“Isn’t that how it goes? You fuck a person and that person falls in love with you.”

 

“Wait so this is some Disney shit? Dude, we’re in an Asian country, it doesn’t work out that way here! There’s a ton of foreplay, and the sex might when you’re married-“

 

“Isn’t that how it goes in the shows you force me to watch?“

 

“Something tells me you don’t watch the Asian dramas.” Miko gulped the rest of her beer before continuing. “Look, you twink, what do you want to happen after you do have sex with him?”

 

“Uh-“ This was the stage in their relationship that Ryo never actually reached in previous incarnations. Usually, it only ended with him pining for a dead Akira at the end of Armageddon without any closure to move on from.

 

“You haven’t thought about it?”

 

“I never…” Ryo could not understand the final argument in the reading. By then, he gave his full attention to a sober Miko and stowed his papers away.

 

“Y’know, if you really want to have a relationship with that so-called idiot of yours, it doesn’t just end with him saying ‘I love you too’. There’s a ton of chapters you have to co-write with him, and it’s up to you if you want to discontinue and start anew or not,” she said before giving him a half-smile.

 

“I know. I was there when you and Kukun broke up.”

 

“Stop calling him that. Ugh, fucking embarrassing-“

 

“I don’t even know if what I feel for him merits a continuation or not. I mean, it’s my first time. I don’t want to think about it too much.”

 

Miko laughed. “This is the first time I’ve seen Ryo Asuka blush.” Ryo rolled his eyes in response to Miko pulling out her phone. “What? This deserves a post in Snapchat.”

 

“Please. You exaggerate this business too much. And it’s not like he likes me back. The hell, it’s like we’re in high school all over again.”

 

“Well aren’t you going senile? You’re almost a senior and you haven’t gotten a SO yet. You should make good use of this chance. I mean, he’ll only be hear for two months, but you can make the most out of it.”

 

Ryo felt his chest involuntarily deflating at Miko’s last remark. It was weird to be feeling these kinds of emotions and his brain is unable to process these macabre thoughts. Imagining a nude Akira was easy. Imagining an Akira smiling at him and saying the three accursed words, naked or not, was beyond comprehension.

 

“Look, if you really do want to act on those feelings, you can confess after he wins. Even if he doesn’t reciprocate at first, we have time to make him reconsider. You’re gonna be sticking to him like glue during training. According to psychology, proximity begets liking. Plus make sure to like the same shit he does, even if it means going to church with him.”

 

“You’re fucking kidding me.”

 

“Nope, time to dust up your sexton robes and save loose change for the offering. Dude, you also have to have similar tastes as him.”

 

“I thought opposites attract.”

 

“Research says otherwise. Anyway you have high marks on the attractiveness department, and Akira had already said a ton of times that you’re pretty, right? Fuck, he can’t even compliment you properly. You sure he’s really the one?”

 

“You’re making me have second thoughts of giving a shit about him. I hate you. There’s so much work-“

 

“Since when was this shit easy? You want a hot boyfie? You better work, bitch.”

 

“God, I can’t wait to meet my Miko tomorrow.”

 

“You can start by not saying God’s name in public,” Miko sighed.

* * *

“Can we pass by the church, please?” Akira said to a half-dead Ryo after roadwork. He woke up thirty minutes later than usual due to the commute back (he left Miko with Mayuta to drive home and blocked her number on his phone because he disliked consequences) and nearly missed his stop by taking a power nap on the way. Akira was dutifully waiting for him just at the guard’s house, track jacket and shorts on. Ryo could not even ogle too much because he was so tired and annoyed at the thought of seeing this asshole later.

 

“Why?” He couldn’t believe he was walking with him inside, being drawn by the arm. They sat at the very front pew.

 

“I forgot my morning prayers,” he said with such conviction that Ryo almost believed in the goodness of someone out there. He corrected such blasphemy though once his knees ached as both of them closed their hands and rested their elbows in front. Akira even brought a rosary and began to utter the Apostle’s Creed before closing his eyes.

 

Ryo eyed him for a full minute to make sure he wouldn’t be distracted. At the uttering of ‘Hail Mary’ he then whipped out his readings as quietly as possible and began to highlight them slowly yet steadily. He managed to finish Aquinas and was about to read the first one for _Humanae Vitae_ when he heard the clicking of beads.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

Ryo forced himself not to freeze as he threw the papers in his outstretched binder.

 

“You’re noisy, Akira,” he hissed.

 

“Sh- sorry about that,” he said before returning back into his prayers again and Ryo managed to take his papers without a sound. He hated this chapter regarding contraception. Not like he gives a shit about having offspring anyway. Children are abominable.

 

“Seriously, Ryo, are you even trying to care?” He nearly jumped back when Akira’s eyes flashed at him suspiciously.

 

“I’m discussing with God what he thinks about Humanae Vitae. You were interrupting our conversation,” he said curtly. “Are you even done praying?”

 

“S-Sorry. I didn’t know you cared about having a family so much-“

 

“What the f-heck-“ He couldn’t even say invectives properly due to what Miko said. He inhaled. “Just- Let us pray.”

 

He gave up caring and stowed his readings back at his bag and corrected his postures, hands together, but face turned at Akira. He was mumbling his prayers almost out loud, knees too far apart, eyes too latched shut. He was also intense in attempting to talk to a god that wouldn’t answer. Melancholy enveloped him as he stared. This incarnation was the same as another one before. Putting his faith in a higher being more than willing to make him suffer.

 

By then he clasped his hands tightly and just closed his eyes as he tried to converse with a being he knew that cared less about a fallen’s tribulations.

 

_If you’re there, you shameless impediment, make Akira’s wishes come true. I know you’re no genie, and I deserve nothing, yadda yadda, you know the drill. I just- I just want you to make sure that Akira’s happy here. I don’t care if my end will be like the others, but you have to promise that no matter what, Akira won’t die in vain. Or at least, he won’t die by my hands. I’m tired of dooming us both._

By then, Ryo opened his eyes and found Akira sitting on his right. Ryo said nothing as he wiped his face and waited for him to close the door when they were outside.

 

“What do you pray, usually?” Ryo asked when they went to the cafeteria to get breakfast.

 

“Hmm…” Akira said before whipping out a clean face towel from his bag and giving it to him without question. Ryo could not believe that his body was performing unnecessary actions again and began to cover his eyes. “Uh, I prayed for war and poverty to end, the downfall of hedonism, of racism and slavery, more jobs to open up-“

 

“That’s too woke-“

 

“Yeah, well. I prayed for my family too! And Miki’s, and your girlfriend’s-“

 

“She’s just my trainer-“

 

“Well, and yours-“

 

“I don’t have a biological family.” There was no bitterness in his mouth as he remembered Akira’s.

 

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

 

“We’re not going to talk about it. Carry on.”

 

“And all the people who did bad things to me and to Miki and the rest of the people who did bad things to them and made them that. I prayed that God will forgive them like I had with the people who wronged me.” He said as he scooped his rice porridge and asked for additional egg and chicken in his. He added extra fish sauce on top as well. “I also prayed for the demons who tempt us. And Satan too.” Both of them sat down across each other. Ryo made coffee to force himself awake. His head cleared, however, at the mention of the former morning star.

 

He pretended to scoff at the mention of his other self. “Even that bastard?”

 

Akira began mixing his porridge. “Yeah, I read it from Mark Twain when I was twelve. No one prays for him. Might as well be the first one who does, right? I figured he must be lonely, playing the role of the enemy so we’d become good. Doesn’t that suck?”

 

Ryo could not look at Akira and stared at his paper cup. “Guess.”

 

“For all our flaws, we deserve less than a being doomed to be shunned for eternity. Dude must really hate God for sentencing him to an existence like that, when we’re promised death and better lives with all of our failure and pride. I mean, I can’t count the people who I think deserves to rot in hell more than said dude.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Eh, I know things will continue to suck for him, but I hope God sends the message so he’ll know that someone still cares.”

 

“Oh.”

 

Akira scratched his ear then, letting himself flare red. “Yeah, it’s complete bonkers.”

 

“No,” Ryo said, grasping onto Akira’s towel more tightly. “It’s unthinkable, but it’s not stupid.” He felt his hairs standing on end as he remembered his prayer. “I’m sure Satan would be thankful in his own, uh, way.”

 

“Yeah, I can’t say anything much when I’ve been blessed enough to continue living without much worry except defeating Koda and you,” Akira said. “So I hope Satan milks it while he can.”

 

Ryo did not even bother correcting him about his pronouns. “You want drinks?”

 

“Nah, I forgot about your knee. I’ll get it. You sure you’ll only have those?” he pointed at his fern salad and coffee. “After your morning classes we can buy a decent meal, yeah? I was supposed to invite Miki, but she has consultations. Looks like you’re stuck with me the rest of the day.”

 

“Pretty sure I’ll get tired of your ugly mug.” Shit, he couldn’t even say a proper thank you. “Yeah, ok.”

 

Akira grinned again. “Thanks, Ryo.”

 

Ryo found himself smiling as well. There was a feeling he never expected his heart to have.

 

It felt full.

 

* * *

Ten hours later and Ryo was still smiling even when Miko was rapping her knuckles against his skull.

 

“Yo man, you still there, what the hell?” she said, folding her arms before a devilish grin crept up on her mouth. She leaned closer. “If you don’t snap out of it, I’ll tell Akira about your crush- mppfff-“

 

That was enough for Ryo to blink back and look at their surroundings. The gym was alive as ever, Akira on the ring already, wearing a fitted jersey shirt that showed off his abs quite splendidly for his thirst to still somewhat. He was leaning forward from the ropes and was waving at him. “Hey, what are you talking about over there? Let’s get this started, ayt?”

 

“Something tells me that you’re high today,” Miki said silkily as she began to climb up. “I also deserve a fucking explanation why you called Mayuta to bring me home last night instead of hailing an Uber-“

 

“I would be spending money then,” Ryo shrugged.

 

“Liar, you knew where my wallet was. You paid for our shit last night,” she snorted.

 

“What are you guys talking about?” Akira asked quizzically.

 

“None of your business,” both of them said in unison, shutting him up for awhile as Miko put on her gloves.

 

Ryo folded his arms. Apparently, this day flash-forwarded due to him losing his sanity and letting fate take the wheel. That was enough anaesthesia for his knee until now, forcing him to lean back on the plastic chair as he looked at the two pacing each other at the ring.

 

“Wait, so a sparring match already?” Akira said.

 

“I have to test you first, if you really were all what Ryo said-“

“I didn’t say anything,” he flatly remarked.

 

“B-But I don’t hit women. According to an esteemed master in a series I watch, guys who hit women are the biggest losers in the world.”

 

“The fuck, is this guy for real? My, my, my Ryo, what a catch-“

 

“Don’t say it.”

 

“-fish. It’s catchfish ok? Don’t go full mad dog on me.” Miko stretched her arms and turned back at Akira. “Then see me as an opponent instead of a woman, you fucking weeb.”

 

“I’m not exactly a weeb, Miss Miko. I only watch two anime per season at most. I like watching western series more-“

 

“Way to kill the vibe here,” Miko slapped his forehead. “Listen here, Akira. Don’t waste my time, alright? I’m doing Ryo a favour already by coming here only to hear your bitching after getting my usual dose of bitching back at the office. It’s not as fun as ‘The Office’ if you want to ask and ten times a nightmare, so,” she squared her shoulders and leaned her left foot back. “Let’s dance.”

 

It only took two seconds before she closed the distance and unleashed a quick one-two. This made Akira pull back and double his defence. He was too slow though, and received a vicious left hook that sent him to his knees and staring at the floor. Ryo saw him turning his head to evade the brunt of the blow, but the damage was done. Miko was a damn proficient head hunter. It was the reason Ryo even approached her in the first place. He preferred quick submissions, given his lithe physique and inability to take too much damage.

 

Miko leaned back at Ryo. “Was that too much?”

 

He shrugged. “He underestimated you.”

 

She sighed. “Yeah, I got too pissed off. Akira, sorry about that. Let’s try again.”

 

It took awhile for Akira to steady himself. “Y-You’re amazing.”

 

“Yeah, I should be the one doing the complimenting,” she said, stretching her legs. “We’re not even doing kicks yet. You up for another round?”

 

“P-Please,” he gave a quick bow and they were off again, with Miko leading him on as Akira tried seizing the momentum, continuing his flurry of combinations and step-ins.

 

It was manic, Ryo surmised, but not predictable. Akira did not depend on patterns with his attacks, nor did he rely too much on his fists. He also had decent-but-not too-decent footwork. He had power, obviously, but he tried balancing it with a surprisingly sturdy defence. This guy was good. He had potential.

 

Miko saw it too. For one, she let her left arm receive the most damage as she readied her flickers. She was testing his ability to navigate through outboxers this time, and Ryo could only stare as Akira continued pressing forward, being able to come within striking range until the bell rung. This time, Miko raised a fist to signal it was over.

 

“Well, this is pretty boring,” she yawned as she began removing her gloves to Akira’s surprise. “Ryo, you said three weeks right? You can subtract one, if you still know your basic math.”

 

“W-Why? Shouldn’t we be maximising our time-“ Akira said but not before letting Miko come up to him, looking really cross as he let him cower on the corner.

 

“We can train with kick next week. You have a good grasp of the basics so you don’t need much training on this field. Look, you can go at the speed bag first. I need to talk to Ryo for a moment.”

 

While Akira walked on cheerfully and began striking up a conversation with Miko’s fellow trainers, she quickly rounded up on him, her mouth a thin line of concern. “Dude adjusts quickly. Didn’t expect this shit.”

 

“I thought you said dude was strong already-“

 

“Well, he can get stronger, and that’s what I’m worried about. I may be doing you a favour, but I’m also your coach. He wants to fight you again, right? If we count the recovery time of your knee-“

 

“I don’t want to face that idiot. Too much war flashbacks for handle,” he said matter-of-factly. “Teach him everything you know. I’ll make sure to break my entire leg if he attempts to challenge me again. Don’t worry. Just be a Koda substitute to him. I’ll take care of the rest.”

 

Miko smiled petulantly at him. “You’re really smitten by him.”

 

Ryo shrugged. “More or less.”

 

“Okay, just promise me that you won’t fight this catchfish again.”

 

“Please don’t make it stick.”

 

“I’ll think of something else.”

 

“Don’t.”

 

“You’re still a fucking stuck-up. Just promise me, ok?”

 

“Yeah. I solemnly swear to only blow his brains out and not in a murderous manner. That would be unsatisfying.”

Miko did not even bother to declare how weird Ryo was when aroused and went ahead to call Akira.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Quote is from Mark Twain, and said series is Mob Psycho (spec. ep 10). Enjoy! Hopefully, I’ll be able to finish this fic ASAP (and as long as I don’t add too much story elements).
> 
> I won’t be trying anymore to hide the fact that I’m channelling my past college self in this fic. Nostalgia sucks.


	5. V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akira may not be as forgetful as he thought.

_“Such a mistake to want clarity above all things.”_

_— Louise Glück, Moonless Night (Meadowlands)_

 

* * *

 

Ryo was not having the time of his life but no one took him seriously when he said that. One of the signs that his friends and dorm mates were sure of was how he was starting to incorporate other hues aside from his usual monochromatic colour scheme. He was starting to don blues through his torn jeans and denim jacket. In addition, he bought himself a decent oversized reversible hoodie whenever he goes to the library at an online yard sale in the university trade the moment he got his allowance.

 

Another thing was his usual stoic self now taking selfies with his phone and just hogging the hell out of it before sleeping and after studying. Wamu and Gabi’s mouths were hanging as Ryo steadily ignored them during breakfast, munching on his toasted sunny side eggs without a care in the world. They wanted to get his phone to find out the mystery human but Ryo only needed to whip out his butterfly knife and they would scurry away from the bathroom.

 

The third was how frequent Ryo was eating to unlimited Korean barbecue on the street near Gabi’s university with Akira. His body also had no problem with losing weight like Ryo’s, so he was the best comrade to be with on the meat battlefield. That was only until they were banned for eating too much. They had to resort to eating the dumpling with rice combo in Gabi’s university instead (Akira by then was saving money for gas and traffic was hellish as usual).

 

“This place is like your school’s,” said Akira before drinking more of his _pandan_ tea, famously known as _pantea_ with the local students. “Lots of trees,” he said, noting the _acacia,_ native mango and ebony trees bordering the wide roads. He thought of having Akira do roadwork there on the weekends.

 

“This place is bigger than ours though. The campus is like a suburb. Tons of unused land,” he said as they began to walk around. “We can go to their sunken garden if you like. During February they host the largest college music festival there. In the country, I mean.”

 

“Seriously? That’s cool.”

 

“You wanna walk or…” Ryo was ready to hail the jeepney when his face lost colour at the sight of those familiar dreadlocks from one of the passengers. “Y’know what, let’s go back to the Architecture building. I forgot my phone.”

 

“The hell Ryo, what’s gotten into you?”

 

He made sure to walk a fair distance away from Akira, his thirst be damned.

 

“Hey Ryo!”

 

“Uh, I think someone’s calling you-“

 

“Who? I don’t know him,” Ryo said quickly and began doubling the pace. By the time they rounded on the curb in front of the university statue of a giant man in nude offering his pair of balls to the world, both of them began to catch their breath. Ryo quickly took his phone from his pocket. “Oh, it’s here.”

 

“Damn right it is,” Akira panted. “What was that for?”

 

“Just wanted to admire the sunflowers,” he pointed at the stretch of flowers along the edges of the entrance roads. He was damn sure that was Gabi. Shit, he thought that asshole would only be commuting to uni this time. He turned his head back. No one in sight except for people in track shorts and frolicking students.

 

“Want me to take your picture?” Akira said enthusiastically.

 

“No. We’re going home.” Ryo began walking back to the other direction, back to the waiting shed in front of the College of Human Kinetics, a fancy term they used for Physical Education.

 

“What are you talking about? Take a picture with me.”

 

“No way-“

 

“Too late!” Akira had already brandished his phone and with that above-average strength of his, pulled back Ryo to his chest and nearly lost balance in front of the sunflowers. “Oh man,” he said as he inspects it. “You should see the look on your face-“

 

“I’d rather not. We’re going home, you asshole.” It was enough to wind him out. He tried catching his breath as he began walking towards the Human Kinetics building.

 

“I thought we’re going to the Sunken Garden!”

 

“Change of plans,” Ryo said turning his head again in case he sees those dreaded dreadlocks from he-who-must-not-be-seen. “I need to go to the library. Something just came up.”

 

His phone then rung. Ryo froze as he saw ‘dreads’ on the contacts.

 

_Are you in my uni right now? Think I saw you earlier._

 

By then Ryo broke into a run, knee be damned,  and left Akira to commute by himself.

 

* * *

 

 

“What would happen if Gabi sees you?” Miko said as she chomped on her rice noodles. They were in the Makimura household, yet again after Miki invited them for afternoon snacks. Miko got drawn in for the same reasons.

 

“The last thing I need is for them to know I was with Akira,” he hissed after drinking his tea. Miki was bickering with Akira on the other end as usual. Taro, her brother was peering at him quite curiously. Ryo peered back with the deadest eyes he could muster. The kid squealed and resumed eating immediately

 

“What’s wrong with that?”

 

“They never see me with anyone. They’ll begin spreading half-truths-“

 

“Half-truths, what?”

 

“They’ll assume the impossible,” Ryo’s eyes then fix on Akira again, mouth full of noodle, eyes as fierce and unrelenting as he usually is. “And I don’t like answering too many questions.”

 

“You will introduce him sooner or later though. Nothing you can do about it. And eat your _pancit._ It’s getting cold.” She tossed her two ripe green calamondins.

 

He looked at the sliced carrots and cabbages and fishballs and squidballs Miki added along with some chicken strips as he mixed everything together with the calamondin juice. It looked appetizing, but the sight of the person in front made him ignore it.

 

Akira must have noticed and grinned at his direction. This was enough for Ryo to turn his attention to the food.

\--

“You sure you can make to Gate 1? The lights aren’t too bright here,” Akira said as they trudged upwards the stairs back at the university. The area from the residential area where Miki and Akira lived up to the guard gates was a nature stronghold of sorts, with lots of foliage that covered the road sans the priests’ private buildings. The e-jeep has stopped services two hours ago, Ryo noted at his phone. Judging from the time, however, there was still traffic from the main highway.

 

“It’s fine. Nothing here except the occasional white ladies and beheaded priests…” Ryo may believe in the supernatural, but his constant strolling around the area at night made him conclude that ghosts didn’t roam the college, even that old communications building his philosophy 101 professor kept spooking the class about.

 

“D-Don’t fuck with me Ryo!” Akira said, who was inching closer and closer to Ryo, to his furtive pleasure.

 

“’Course I’m not,” he said, pointing at the building. Akira immediately pushes his hand away.

 

“D-Don’t point at something randomly. There might be ghosts, dammit!”

 

“Do you want me to take a picture too?”

 

“Stop that!”

 

“You can just go home if you can’t handle it.” This Akira was a joy to tease.

 

“I’m not scared. I-I’ll come with you.” His arm was now rubbing against his quite aggressively. He turned his head away in case the light of the waiting shed revealed his expression.

 

“I might be here for awhile,” Ryo sighed as he slapped an attacking mosquito on his arm. He quickly cleaned its remains with rubbing alcohol. “I’m waiting for the traffic to subside.”

 

“I-I’ll come with you then!” Akira quickly made his way to walk side-by-side as he made his way forward, making Ryo quite happy that the lights were dim enough until they reach the row of white metal ornate chairs littering the edge of the building. Far below were the hazy lights of the next town. Far beyond the multicoloured lights was a dim area for the cemetery. Beyond the buildings were the mountains that lead to the next town over.

 

“Your house’s over there-“

 

“Don’t point out of nowhere! Shit, what’s with all the insects around here-“

 

“If you’re not careful, you might get dengue fever,” he said matter-of-factly.

 

“N-No shit?”

 

Ryo got his anti-insect lotion and threw it at his direction. He muttered thanks as he began to slather it on his limbs and neck.

 

“This place is really beautiful,” Akira said as they continued looking at the lights below. To their left, the priests were turning off the lamps in their rooms as well for the night.

 

“We’re actually standing at the edge of a fault line,” Ryo’s eyes twinkled. “If an earthquake were to happen right now, we’d be dead meat.”

 

“Seriously?”

 

“Yeah,” he snickered. “Your friend and her family too.”

 

“Why would they build a school here?”

 

“Dunno. Never really understood what humans are thinking,” Ryo stowed back the lotion. “If we’re lucky, we can have a view of the moonrise.”

 

“Wow, this is pretty cool,” Akira said as he looked on eagerly. By then, Ryo made himself stare at his chiselled jaw down to his still lotion-laden neck. He could not really help it. He knew that this was not his Akira, that it was best to actually try looking away. This will not end well. This had never ended well-

 

“What is that?” Ryo froze.

 

“What?”

 

He could not stop himself from shaking. “That thing- on your ear-“ Shit, why didn’t he notice it before, after the times he spent training with him?

 

“Oh this?” he pointed at the diamond earring, that accursed thing- “A gift from my ex. Can’t really find the guts to throw it away.”

 

Ryo’s stomach churned at this. “Really now…” He turned back at the sights and muted sounds below.

 

“Did you ever want to not love someone too much?” he said in a faraway voice, unbecoming of him.

 

He could feel his insides knotting up. “Uh…”

 

“Yeah, sorry. I get so emotional sometimes…” he trailed off.

 

“No, I don’t care,” Ryo said. Light seemed to flood the insides of the mountain ranges. “Yes. Sometimes I do.”

 

Akira grew quiet. The first moon was slowly making its way up towards the horizon. It got brighter and brighter as it rose. He could also see the outlines of the next one following suit.

 

“Thanks for bringing me here,” Akira said.

 

“No problem,” Ryo said.

 

“I- Shit,” he then laughed. “Seeing the moon gets me teary-eyed for some reason.”

 

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell Makimura,” he assured. He could relate.

 

“I… well, I always dream about them,” Akira said. “But in my dream, there’s only one, hovering over a sea of red.”

 

Ryo couldn’t look at him. Suddenly he could feel cold sweat trickling down. _He knows. He fucking knows. This Akira remembers-_

“And I was lying on the ground and I couldn’t remember this part that much- but there was also someone beside me. I’ve been having this dream for a long time now. Whoever was beside me looked impossibly sad. I couldn’t make out its face, but whenever I would try to look at that person, I’d wake up. It always happens. No matter how hard I try to note it down, I never remember who it was.” He then shifted at his seat. “But I do remember that person to be beautiful. I can’t describe it properly, but it’s the only adjective I can describe that person to be. And then when I open my eyes, I would suddenly tear up.”

 

 _It’s Akira. He’s really Akira. Shit._ Ryo began to shake as he shifts his body away.

 

“Are you ok dude? You don’t look well-“

 

“I-I’m fine. It’s getting chilly,” he tried to walk but he had difficulty standing up. “I think I need to go-“

 

“Dude are you really ok?” Akira’s hands were now supporting his shoulders. Ryo quickly tried shaking them away. “This must be those mosquitoes! You should’ve put on that lotion-“

 

“I told you, I’m fine,” Ryo tried to push him again and began to walk as fast as his trembling legs could carry him. He must get away from him. If he remembered who he was, if he found out what he did-

 

“Are you sure?” Akira’s voice was smaller now. “I’m sorry, did I trigger anything?”

 

Shit, fuck Akira and his high EQ. He now found himself having difficulty breathing as he collapsed on all fours. He inhaled and exhaled and panicked in between. _This can’t be happening, of all times, what the fuck are you playing, you bastard Creator-_

“Sorry Ryo, but you are definitely _not_ ok,” Akira then said. With that, he felt his legs being lifted from the ground. Soon, his eyes were now meeting Akira’s. This was fucking humiliating. For him to see him so helpless, so _terrified_ , so detestable- “Let’s go back to my place. Miki will know what to do. She’s going to med school soon so-“

 

“Don’t look at me. I look weak,” Ryo said as he attempted to cover his face.

 

“Dude, it’s fine,” Akira said, no trace of jest or jeer in his lips. “Sorry about that. Must be something terrible, huh?” Both of them then began to move. Ryo remembered the dozing guard downstairs.

 

“C-Carry me on your back, this is fucking embarrassing-“

 

“Don’t worry. You’re not really that heavy,” Akira grinned. “Makes me wonder, you’re as fragile as a toothpick and as light as my bunnies back home, and yet you fucking beat the likes of me…”

 

“I still lost to you,” Ryo scoffed. He needed to stroke this idiot’s ego so he can leave ASAP. He also had bunnies? This was too déjà vu and jamais vu, even for him.

 

“Didn’t taste the extent of your strength though,” said Akira. “Why they call you Lucifer. I won’t let you out of my sight until we fight.”

 

“If you win, will you leave me alone?”

 

“Dunno about that. You’re my friend so…”

 

Shit, he couldn’t show his face at this asshole. He will definitely make fun of him-

 

“I don’t like all those stories where we’ll be strangers after the fight. It’s nothing personal, anyway. Plus Miki would be sad if you and coach don’t visit. You’re the only friends who came to her place.”

 

That’s another twist. “Thought that b- Makimura has many friends.”

 

“Hmm… not really. She gets along well with everyone, but it doesn’t mean she’s close with them all. She’s quite picky with her friends,” Akira said quite thoughtfully. “Plus you’re my friends too, so- shit- sorry-“

 

Akira nearly slipped through the first stair down if not for skidding on both feet at the fifth one below. Ryo ignored this bumble because his prince was now holding onto him more tightly.

 

“Pretty sure it’s because we’re your friends.” In truth, he could not see any other reason for her to try accommodating them. He only saw her during their projects in the org, but other than that, it was Akira’s fault.

 

“Nah, she said she can trust you guys taking care of me.” He was right. It was Akira.

 

Ryo by then shut his mouth and stared at Akira’s chest.

 

“You look like a cute baby, y’know.”

 

“Fuck off.“

 

* * *

 

Whatever presumptions Akira made regarding Miki’s friendship group was easily broken into itty bitty pieces the moment they entered and saw the familiar faces of Junichi and Koda.

 

“R-Ryo?”

 

“What the f-“

 

Before any of the two can react, however, Miki scrambled over the table and was taking Ryo’s temperature.

 

“I’m fine. Akira’s overreacting again.”

 

“I am not. He was having difficulty breathing earlier-“

 

“Shut the hell up,” Ryo was no longer embarrassed within the sights of these petty humans. Both Jun and Koda were still in their chairs at the dinner table. “What are you two doing here?” he addressed them.

 

“Studying for orals,” Junichi remarked. “Uhm, what happened?”

 

“Nothing of import. I’m going home.” Ryo tried leaving Akira’s grasps but was completely sent to bed by Miki. As the door shut and left him under the mercy of the crucifixes and baby Jesus, he could hear Koda cackling at the sorry state he was now in, but not before he heard the sound of broken glass and the crash of a table. That must be Akira. There were sounds of more muffled voices after a few minutes. When things got quiet, Miki opened the door with a set of pills and a tall glass of water.

 

“S-Sorry, it’s Akira again. I shut him out. Just take a quick break right here and he’ll take you home.”

 

Ryo stood up at this. “I still have orals to study for so-“

 

“Oh, you’re still not done?” Miki laughed. “We’re actually doing the thesis statements right now. Want to go over it with us? After taking your medicine, of course.”

 

“How the heck were they invited over?”

 

“Uhm, it was by chance actually. Jun was in the org room asking me if I was done, so I invited him. Koda came along too so…”

 

“Do we have the same prof?”

 

“I think so?”

 

Ryo swallowed. He had to make a decision quickly. Either he studies alone, without these fools breathing down his neck and potentially fail his orals in the process, or he studies with these fools breathing down his neck and drag them to fail like him.

 

Yes, that seemed to be the better option.

 

* * *

 

Akira ended up bringing him home after three hours of heated discussion. Surprisingly, sans Koda’s outburst regarding Aquinas, they managed to complete six out of ten thesis statements. Miki heavily insisted it, despite Ryo telling Miki he can just hail a taxi.

 

“You don’t know what will happen. It’s not safe.”

 

“I’m a man. Nothing will happen.”

 

“It doesn’t matter if you’re a man or a woman. Anyone can become a victim!”

 

Given that she pulled the gender-neutral card and that her voice was grating him, Ryo let Akira drown them in cheesy radio advice columns and the quelling traffic outside.

 

“Tell me a story,” Akira said after awhile. He lowered the volume of the radio correspondence, to Ryo’s chagrin. The cuckold caller was now confronting his wife and the DJ was having difficulty calming them down.

 

“Isn’t it common politeness that you start first?”

 

Akira kept his eyes on the road as he spoke. They already past the cursed highway often laden with car accidents. “My stories don’t have happy endings.”

 

It was starting to rain. Ryo looked for his umbrella in his bag. “Likewise.”

 

“Aren’t we edgelords?” Akira laughed as he slowed the car. “And I already told you mine earlier! Y’know, the single moon, the red sea…”

 

“That was a dream, not a story. And you didn’t even have an ending.”

 

“Y-Yeah, I don’t.”

 

It stung because it was true. “My story doesn’t have a clear ending either.”

 

“You didn’t even tell me yours,” he then said guiltily, “Look, I only said that because I was bored-“

 

“I’ll tell you next time. I’m going to sleep. Wake me up when we’re there.”

 

“Okay…” Akira was quiet for several seconds. “Uh, I guess… I’m sorry, for pushing you earlier. It feels like I tend to push you a lot…”

 

Ryo pretended not to hear. Even when Akira was cracking into quiet sobs.

 

“I must make you remember a lot of sad things. Even when we first met… uh, yeah. Even though you know how demanding I am, you still stuck with me, uhm…”

 

“Shut your trap, I can’t even fake my sleeping if you suddenly break down.” He did not need Akira apologizing. No matter how annoying or ‘demanding’ he felt he was, he had every reason to be. “You just remind me of a story that stuck with me, a long time ago. About an angel who lived on the moon.”

 

“Did it remind you of your parents?”

 

“Should it? I don’t remember them.” He would have wanted a dad as a professor, like before, if he was honest.  He could have learned how to mingle with humans in this plane at least. “It’s just a story. It doesn’t have to be rooted with my family issues.”

 

“So how did it went?”

 

“Well, the angel had…” Ryo swallowed his words. “It asked a human boy to grant its wish. The human boy became a devil and he stayed by his side after awhile. But the angel’s wish became his end, until only the angel and the moon remained.”

 

“What happened to the boy who became a devil?”

 

“The devil died, and the angel cried.”

 

Akira could not say anything. Ryo kept his silence as well. He knew what it meant.

 

“Do you believe that story’s true?”

 

Ryo turned his head at him. There was that breezy grin on his face.

 

“If you do see that angel cry again, I’ll wipe its tears for you. Don't sweat on it.”

 

“You’re impossible.”

 

Akira continued driving. Ryo looked out the window, past the towering condominiums and corporate buildings, searching for a moon.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not dead yet. But yeah, kind of busy with RL and another multific from another fandom. BTW, ARE YOU GUYS ALSO FOLLOWING BANANA FISH PLEASE HMU @ellynadarna (Twitter) IF YOU ARE I NEED YOUR FIX-IT FIC RECS.
> 
> I actually went back home last month and visited my old school so nostalgia is real folks.


End file.
